Honest answer
How many reminders is too many?
Every family starts with too many. The instinct is to cover everything, and covering everything is precisely what makes none of it work.
Short answer
Three or four a day is the practical ceiling for most people. Beyond that they stop being events and become background noise, which costs you the important ones too.
Choose by consequence
Ask what actually goes wrong when the thing is missed. Missing a drink on a hot day matters. Missing a prompt to water the plants does not. Set reminders only where the consequence is real.
A sensible starting set
- Mid-morning: a drink.
- Midday: the main meal.
- Mid-afternoon: a drink and a short walk or a call.
- Early evening: the evening meal, or a call to family.
- Nothing overnight, and nothing during the difficult late-afternoon hour if that applies.
Signs there are too many
Confirmations dropping off, complaints about the phone going all day, or a burst of five confirmations at once in the evening. All three mean the prompts have become something to clear rather than something to act on.
Add slowly
Start with two. Add a third after a fortnight if the first two are holding. It is much easier to add one than to withdraw four without it feeling like something has been taken away.