You Care RemindersCaregiver Support

Late afternoon

Sundowning, and the hour before it

If the day falls apart between four and seven, you are not imagining it and you are not doing it wrong. Here is what tends to be going on, and what to change first.

What sundowning looks like

Restlessness, pacing, wanting to go home while already at home, suspicion, or an insistence that someone is waiting. It usually begins as the light fades and eases later in the evening.

Nobody can say for certain why. Tiredness, low light, hunger, an empty diary and the accumulated effort of a whole day all seem to contribute.

Change the light before you change anything else

Put the lamps on before dusk rather than after it. A room that dims gradually gives the brain a slow, confusing signal; a room already lit avoids the question.

Close curtains before the window turns into a black mirror, which is a common trigger for seeing people outside.

The rest of the toolkit

  • Move the largest meal earlier, and offer a drink and a small snack around four.
  • Keep the late afternoon quiet: no daytime television news, no visitors arriving at five.
  • Give the hour a job — folding, music, a short walk — so it is not empty.
  • Avoid arguing with the content. Answer the feeling instead: 'I know, it's been a long day, let's have a cup of tea first.'
  • Protect the nap. Too much sleep after three often makes the evening worse.

Where a reminder fits

A gentle message at half past three — a drink, a walk, a call from a familiar voice — lands before the difficult hour rather than during it. Timing is the whole trick. You Care Reminders lets you set that message once and leave it running.

The wider picture

around 982,000

people are estimated to be living with dementia in the UK.

Source: Alzheimer's Society

Being straight with you

You Care Reminders is a non-medical wellness tool, not a monitoring service and not an alarm. Delivery is best effort rather than guaranteed, and it must not be used for medication reminders. If you are worried about someone's health, speak to their GP; in an emergency, call 999.

Questions carers ask

Read next

Set the first reminder tonight

It takes about five minutes, costs nothing to start, and the person you care for has nothing to install.

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